Isaiah is pretty sure I ruin everything. He might be right. So he’s going to explain why you shouldn’t listen to your mom.
Tag: isaiah
Isaiahisms Vol 2
It’s that time again. Actually. I forgot last week. Sorry.
I think I have too many things going on, but not so many that I can’t share with you, by popular demand, and my own delusions of grandeur, or ridiculous narcissism when it comes to my son. The new blog: IsaiahDotCom.
Actually he demanded it.
I know you might not have enough time or inclination to read another blog. So every week you will find a recap here. But if you want a blow by blow on the latest antics, head on over to IsaiahDotCom.
This is what you’ve missed:
Isaiah on the Second Amendment
Someday when I’m good enough (at archery), I’ll be able to protect the family.
You have to protect your family. Because when you, Poppy, are all bent over and gray and old and crunchy and saying you have to get over to the gun safe but you can’t because it’s taking so long. I will be able to defend you with my bow and arrow.
Isaiah on Rock Music
I don’t like rock music. I mean mom, I’m really sorry, you know the kind of boy I am. You know what I mean, it’s making my head go like this. (makes face) Yeah mom, I’m sorry, I just don’t like the texture.
Isaiah on Hiring a Babysitter
She said “Chicks” mom! You know, “I live with a couple of chicks.” That is downtown language. We do not use downtown language in this house. I’m sorry, but she’s fired.
So if you want to know more head on over to IsaiahDotCom – he said that. Not me.
If Isaiah Had a Million Dollars
One of my least favorite games that my sister and I play is “What Would We Do if We Won The Lottery?”
We always buy lottery tickets as a team, especially when we are miles away from our home. (We are convinced based on the median income in our specific set of suburbs that the lottery commission has made it impossible for anyone in our neighborhood to win.)
As soon as we are in the car, tickets in hand, my sister says, “OK, what’s the first thing we’re going to do when we win?”
To which, I respond, “I don’t want to play this game.”
“Well for sure we won’t tell the husbands.” She says undaunted by my lack of participation. (Now don’t be surprised by that statement, (and Don, I know you’re reading this – just move a long, nothing to see here) we just want to have a game plan BEFORE we tell the husbands.)
“Dude, I am not playing this game.” I say half-heartedly because I know she’s going to keep on playing without me.
I don’t like to play the “What if” game because to me it feels a little like coveting, and when I start to feel like maybe I am coveting I realize that we are one step away from greed. I tell myself, I would give lots of money to charity, but inside I still feel a little off. So I choose not to play. Also, I don’t want to get my hopes up because we always lose.
But that didn’t keep me from asking Isaiah what he would do if he had a million dollars.
“Hey Buddy, what would you do with a Million Dollars?”
“That’s easy. I’d buy a Rolls Royce.”
He picked this one out when we went to The Mecum Auto Show. He was so mad that we didn’t buy it when he realized it went for only $16,000. I tried to explain to him that it would also cost $16,000 for an oil change.
“Ok, what else would you do with a Million Dollars?”
“I would probably have A Mansion, you know – have someone build me one. And I’d have gates, gates, lots of gates, around the house and a big one in the front with a lock on it so no one can get in.
And I’d have a big dining table, lots of food, maybe some parties.
Two Chandeliers,
a whole bunch of cool stuff.”
So, that’s what Isaiah would do with a Million Dollars. I asked him if I could come live in the mansion with him. He said, “Well, you could be the maid, or the nanny or something.”
Gee, thanks.
And this has been a Finish the Sentence Friday post. The sentence was “If I Had A Million Dollars I…”
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