Have I told you that my son is a pyromaniac? Oh, no? My son is a pyromaniac. Actually, lately, I realize I might be wrong. Apparently part of the definition of pyromania “is repeated association with fire but without a real motive”. Well my son has motive, his motive is to set a fire. He tells me that the reason why he likes fire so much is because it is pretty. Also, it is his favorite color, orange. I think he would actually prefer to blow something up, but we don’t have any “real” dynamite. The other day I came home and he told me to put gun-powder on the grocery list. Sure dude, I’ll get right on that. Where would that be located? The blow your household up aisle?
The other day he was really mad at me. He was getting ready to go ignite some dynamite (he makes fresh dynamite daily) he was trying to sneak by me with one of those fireplace lighters. I have mentioned this before, there is no one in this house that can pull the wool over these magic eyes. I stopped him, because if you read paragraph one, you would understand why matches, lighters, flint, two sticks, are completely off-limits in this house. Well he was indignant and this is what he had to say.
“Mom! I was not going to burn the house down! You should trust me! I’ve never burned the house down in my whole life!”
I tried not to laugh, and instead, to defuse the situation (get it Pun-Lovers of America, de-Fuse?) I asked him to tell me about his plans so I could videotape it. Well this kid loves the camera, and this is what I got.
I had to pull this youTube video, but you really shouldn’t miss it! Go to my youTube channel at JenKehl to check it out!