He Said What? 2013 Top 10 Funny Quotes by my Kid

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If it wasn’t for my son I wouldn’t have a blog. Really. Don’t get me wrong, I love to write, I’ve been working on a novel for 4 years now! I really love to write. But Isaiah is an amazing kid. Through all of his adversity; sensory processing disorder, life threatening food allergies, life threatening environmental allergies and a tic disorder, this kid is still the funniest kid I know. I would be doing you all a great dis-service if I did not share with you a small sampling of the funny things my kid said this year.

“That’s boring mom, you know, like a talking tree is boring. With eyes and a mouth, but no nostrils, or chin. No face really……”

Isaiah said to his Auntie Suzette who was with Uncle Rich “Before you ride into the sunset, I’ll give you 5 bucks for the man. You can just go ahead and get yourself another husband.”

“I won’t swim without a rash guard on because I don’t want everyone staring at my boobs.”

“I was never popular in the eighties, no one ever made movies about me.”

To a kid at the park “if you want to know more, just go to Isaiah.com”

Teaching Isaiah how to mop he said, “you know, you’re kinda like a backseat mopper.”

“Mom, Roscoe’s going to need to dig me three big holes this summer. I’m planning on going to China, Alaska and the North Pole.”

“Mom, I think I’d make a good comedian. I’d talk about boobies a lot, do you think that would be appropriate?”

“Take this milk for instance, it comes from a cow’s gutters.”

and the most recent quote of 2013:

“It’s like I asked for a turkey and cheese sandwich. That’s how fast it is. Santa drives by, gets his sandwich and Christmas is over.”

29 thoughts on “He Said What? 2013 Top 10 Funny Quotes by my Kid

  1. I love collecting moments like this – they are so much fun to look back on and remember 🙂 Good that he’s got the comedy basics down too. In addition to boobies, he might want to consider the comic importance of fart jokes – they’re big with my 4-year-old. Sigh.

    • Funnily enough mine doesn’t do fart jokes. Is that weird? I think it might be…. oh well, he doesn’t do anything he’s supposed to do.

  2. Okay. Every time I picked a favorite, the next one would trump it. To the point that I went back and re-read all of them to level the playing field. He sounds like a very smart kid, which doesn’t surprise me at all. (Go ahead. Blush. That’s huge mom flattery.)

    Please keep writing down his Isaiahisms. That sounds like a religion … and it probably should be. Or at least a killer bathroom book.

    Thanks for linking up, Jen. Happy New Year.

  3. It really would have been a disservice to not post these. Isaiah IS hilarious! My kids aren’t clever enough to say it, but I’m pretty sure I’m a back seat mopper, too.

    • I was telling my husband today about this post Christine, that was the one thing I mentioned, Isaiah said from the backseat, “well, you are a back seat mopper!”

  4. Pingback: Indoctrination Into Thankful » JenKehl

  5. I read this from my phone earlier, and OMG I adore you!!! Also I want a turkey and cheese sandwich. You can go ahead and get yourself another husband???? HAHA XO

  6. He is going to LOVE reading these when he is famous! My fav is, of course, turkey and cheese sandwich. Adorable! Thanks for linking up with SPP. Will feature this this week.

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