Mojo vs. The Evil Dragon Lady

This freakin’ weather! Not everyone has the pleasure of living in the midwest. I am aware of that. And I am acutely aware of the fact that many people live places were the sun shines at least, oh I don’t know; once every 4 days? Wow, that would be heaven. That would be like a TV channel that only played Fawlty Towers, Star Trek Next Generation and Big Bang Theory. No commercials.

The thing is about this time… the thing is, I completely lose my Mojo. Seriously, have you seen it? It’s definitely lost. It wouldn’t be such a big deal if I didn’t need it so badly. Oh Mojo, how I miss you. Without it I am a mere shell of myself, no funny quips and snide remarks. No silliness and tickle fights. Oh yeah, and did I mention no patience? Me – Mojo = Evil dragon Lady.

Have you met my son? No? Let me freshen up your mind a bit. This kid:

Well, my son, I’m pretty sure he has two Mojo’s. Apparently it’s a very rare condition, but it does happen in some children. Here are the symptoms; 

  • Must sing at the top of his lungs at all times (completely made up songs), while using items like brooms, flashlights, dog bones and Tervis Tumblers (very hard plastic glasses) as percussion. Either against each other or the furniture.
  • While playing on his own; must make random screeching noises.
  • Must chase dog while making random screeching noises.
  • Must chase dog pretending he is the police officer and the dog is the robber; screaming and screeching at the top of his lungs. Also encouraging “little dog” to join the party with her ear-piercing bark.
  • Must be happy all of the time.
  • Must climb on the edge of two sofas. In a row.
  • Must hang a rope from the loft and swing from it.
  • Did I mention, Must be singing at all times?

As much as so many of these things make my every waking moment day a little more difficult, I cannot deny the fact that he is ALWAYS happy. Except when he’s not. But the thing is, when he’s not; it is usually my fault. Of course he would be quick to tell you, and I would be quick to deny it. But he would be right. I basically Steal His Sunshine almost everyday. I know, I know, you are all like what? He’s a kid? Who? You are his mother. Yeah, it’s true, but the thing is, I walk a fine line with this boy. He will always be Sensory Boy (if you want to know about that go here) he will always seek out opportunities to Feel more and Hear more. His body actually needs it to help process information.  I will always be Fight with Seasonal Affective Disorder Mom. These are a volatile combination at best, un-combinable at its worse.

Over the past week I have:

  • Asked him to use an inside voice 648 times.
  • Told him to stop chasing the dog 431 times.
  • Asked him to please stop banging on everything 221 times.
  • Begged him to not sing so loud 512 times.
  • Said “go outside” 156 times.
  • Told my husband he needed to go to school instead of being homeschooled 2 times.
  • Grounded him from all TV and Video games for 5 days, with a day being added every time he mouths off to me.

The part I am admitting to you; and only to you is, he’s fine. It’s all me. If you tell anyone else I will deny it.

On a sunny day:

  • I Tickle him first thing in the morning, sometimes for 45 minutes.
  • His songs are funny, and I often write down the words to remember when he’s grown write about in my blog.
  • I can handle the screeching, because I am usually jamming to some disco, or Bossa Nova.
  • I egg on the robber dog, and just shoe them outside when it gets too much.
  • I hug him and kiss him randomly, and tell him how awesome he is.
  • I goad him on to make a better more challenging obstacle course while he climbs the sofas.
  • I take pictures of him while he swings from the rope.
  • And did I mention I even join in on the singing sometimes?

I love my boy. I love him just the way he is. I hate gray skies. Today as we sat in the car outside the library, I explained the concept of stress to this, my 7yo genius. He told me he got it. I told him I just wanted to make sure he knew that no matter what Mommy loved him. He said I know you love me Mommy, don’t worry.  He’s got extra Mojo I tell you, and some day some lucky girl is gonna have to fight me for it.

Here’s a little liquid sunshine for your listening pleasure:

As always, when you realize you can’t live without this song. Click here to go straight to iTunes:

Mas Que Nada – Herb Alpert Presents Sergio Mendes & Brasil ’66

And because you know I need your love, will you click here?

  • I love this! XO

    My son is his own person in his own way too, and he thinks that I am stealing his sunshine much of the time because I ask him to stop doing things like chewing on furniture and taking his glasses off of his face and asking him to eat actual FOOD that doesn’t have “ch” in it (I’m dead serious about the “ch” thing too-starts or ends with it…) I’m terrible, aren’t I? Oh well, I still love him to pieces…ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Hi Sadder Friend ~ There’s a reason why we need to run the show, they’ll learn. My son would only eat Hershey Bars and butter and jelly sandwiches if I let him.ReplyCancel

  • You’re back! With awesome photos and cool words. You are awesome. I love the last line about that someday, some girl is going to have to fight you for his awesome mojo. Sigh. I’m glad that day isn’t tomorrow for either one of us. Because I’m not ready. Also? I’m pretty sure you didn’t actually lose your mojo. Seems to me that it’s still right here. 🙂ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Kristi. I really will fight them. Really. I am soooo glad that day isn’t here yet. And thank you. Thanks for helping me get it back!ReplyCancel

  • You son should shake hands with my daughters. Seriously, they are always happy too and never know how to use their indoor voices, lol!! And the weather, please don’t get me started on that one!!ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Janine! That is so awesome! As much as some days it grates on me, other days I know he’s gonna always make it in this world with that kind of attitude!ReplyCancel

  • If you find the trick to the inside voice please promise to spread the wisdom!ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Kerri ~ Only if you promise to do the same! I think I’ve already said it 20 times today and it’s only 10:30!ReplyCancel

  • Living here is rough and then on a day like today where the sun peeks out for 1 minute, all 500 dandelions bloom instantaneously. I also feel like I steal my son’s sunshine on a daily basis. Oh, parenting. It’s hard. But they’re so cute.ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Jean – Not only dandelions, but mosquitos! They’re out already! What is that all about??!!!ReplyCancel

  • I love this kid and I love that you are the mom that cultivates his imagination. Even though it makes you nuts, how awesome to have someone so happy that they sing all the time in your home. Easy for me to say, right??ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Miss – Totally! Do you know how many times I hear, “He must keep you laughing all day!” I always say, “Why don’t you take him home and see for yourself!”ReplyCancel

  • Aw, he’s adorable. I wish I could send you some of our sunshine from the desert! Will happy, sunny thoughts count? I hope you get your mojo back. Mine plays hide and seek all the friggin’ time. I blame my husband. 😀

    Added your button to my “Crazy-Good Bloggers” page on my blog and following you via BlogLovin’ now. 😀ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Terrye – You’re awesome! Actually the sun came out the day after I wrote that! We had a gorgeous weekend 🙂 It’s a little overcast right now, but they promise more sun this week! I better get all my writing done for the next two weeks while it’s 65 and sunny!ReplyCancel

  • Katia Bishofs

    What a beautiful post, Jen. I’ve identified with so much of it. I feel like my little boy needs to be constantly stimulated, we’ve had shitty weather and baby’s been sick for the last few weeks. Last week I felt so much like what you describe here, but I don’t forget to sing, laugh and encourage my energetic 3 Year Old who fell off the bike onto the road and gave me a heart attack to get back on the bike, despite being weak in the knees. I think this is what parenting is all about and you’ve summarized it beautifully.ReplyCancel

    • Jen

      Thank you Katia. For me it can be really hard to laugh and smile when it’s been so gloomy, but I try and “shake it off!”ReplyCancel

  • Elena Ferdinand

    Hey there! Stopping by from the blog hop! Just wanted to let you know I’m following you via bloglovin’ :o) I hope you’ll get a chance to visit me! You can find me here:

    Blog url
    http://www.croppedstories.blogspot.com

    Bloglovin’
    http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/3718883ReplyCancel

  • “He is happy all the time,” was about the sweetest thing ever! I know we love to joke all over our blogs, but seriously, your love for your son shines in this post.ReplyCancel

  • One Funny Motha

    I know. My son is the same way. He’s always HAPPY. You would think that would be a hard thing to complain about, but his enthusiasm can be too much to take at times. My husband has told him he needs to be a little “less happy.”ReplyCancel

  • Donna Maysack

    This is funny, altho I think your videos are making my Mac act funny. Honey, I’be been a mom to under 10 year olds for 33 years, that is his inside voice. Sorry.ReplyCancel

  • Hey Jen,

    You should seriously consider linking up some of your old homeschool posts on my link up! No need to follow anybody – just link up and meet other homeschooling families.

    Also, this Friday, my first homeschool blogging carnival will be live. If you have a minute, stop by and read some of the posts! We have a great variety of families with different homeschooling philosophies participating. I think we have 4 different countries represented!

    It’s gonna be great!ReplyCancel

  • Break The Jen Mold

    Yeah, good luck with that! Less happy, less loud, less demanding….I’m not holding my breath!ReplyCancel

  • Break The Jen Mold

    I already LOVE your blog, if I’m not following on Bloglovin I will now!ReplyCancel

  • Break The Jen Mold

    This facebook comment thing has me all screwy. I replied on the blog, but I wanted to say thank you. It is a hard time, especially when we have two crazy different personalities. But on the bright side his is awesome and inspires me to be a better person.ReplyCancel

  • Break The Jen Mold

    You may be right about the videos. I have them smushed to not cause so many problems, but if you are using Safari or Firefox, it might not be happy. I have a Mac and use Chrome. I know…sacrilege, but they have figured out a way to do it right, even on Macs. AND thanks for the support. I think I’ll go out and buy some ear plugs!ReplyCancel

  • Donna Maysack

    Seriously ear plugs can save sanityReplyCancel

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